Keep It Simple Sister

On the evening of September 11, 2007 my life changed forever this side of eternity.  It became official at 7:56 PM that my friend, mentor and spiritual dad, Dan Meininger, was called home to heaven. He now stands were he always wanted to be….in the very presence of God Almighty.  Resting in the everlasting arms of Jesus Christ.

Dan and his wife Carolyn have been dear friends of ours since the mid 1990’s.  Little did I know what God had in store when Dan was invited to fill the pulpit for our vacationing pastor. WOW!!  Through his ministry, Dan touched my life, Bob’s, our children and countless others around the world.  His ministry was one of encouragement and intercessory prayer. The foundation of Dan’s calling was focused around Romans 8:26.  When he became burdened by the Holy Spirit to pray for someone, watch out!!!! God was gonna rock your world.  That’s a good thing.

I think I’m still in shock to think that I will never speak to him again as long as God calls me to remain here on earth.  Those precious phone conversations where both of us had our Bibles open and were visiting in anticipation of what God was going to speak through His Word.  You see, everything Dan did was based on what God’s Word says.  Whether is was to praise, rejoice, repent, forgive, love unconditionally, obey, trust, lament - well, you get the idea.

Few of us have had the gift of having a parent (biological, adoptive or spiritual) invest so much time and prayer in our lives.  I was blessed to have enjoyed this very unique and edifying relationship for over a decade.  God used Dan’s life to show me the unconditional love of Abba Father.  

O my dear spiritual dad, how I will miss you.  Thank you for loving me.  To God be the glory, great things He has done. 

Main Entry: ¹pre·tend
Pronunciation: pri-’tend
Function: verb
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French pretendre, from Latin praetendere to allege as an excuse, literally, to stretch out, from prae- pre- + tendere to stretch — more at THIN
transitive verb
1 : to give a false appearance of being, possessing, or performing <does not pretend to be a psychiatrist>
2 a : to make believe : FEIGN <he pretended deafness> b : to claim, represent, or assert falsely <pretending an emotion he could not really feel>
3 archaic : VENTURE, UNDERTAKE
intransitive verb
1 : to feign an action, part, or role especially in play
2 : to put in a claim <cannot pretend to any particular expertise — Clive Barnes>
synonym see ASSUME

I have been thinking……am I a “pretender”?  Do I allow people to think something of me that’s not entirely true.  I think we all, in our human ignorance and insecurity, struggle with that at times. For some, more often than others.

Well, the pretending (at least for today) stops here.  The LORD reminded His children on their journey through the wilderness, “Today, if you hear His voice - don’t harden your heart.”  That passage is noted again in Psalm 95 and in Hebrews 3 &4. Probably somewhere else, but I can’t recall at the moment. 

I think we harden our hearts when, over and over, we are given the opportunity to stop pretending - but we don’t.  We’re afraid if we do, then things won’t “be” what we want, think or believe they should be.  Sounds like Satan lying to us. Trying to get us to buy into the “better hang on” philosophy instead of really allowing God to have His way.  It’s hard work to stop pretending, especially if we’ve built our public image on a “pretended” foundation. 

Life is a progression of seasons.  Sometimes we stay in a mode too long - like an almost 43 year old (hello) with two kids in need of tummy tuck trying to wear pants that were designed for a teen who decided not to eat for the last two days. Not cool - BUT we can convince ourselves of anything if we surround ourselves with folks that want to wear the same thing - whether they’re built for it or not.  (Hmmmmm…..can I get a witness?) LOL - I wonder if people look at me on my Harley and think, “wonder what that old lady’s doing on that softtail?” - however, I do choose to wear pants that fit!

I read a quote from singer Sheryl Crow - she’s been through some tough stuff the last few years - dumped by Lance Armstrong and breast cancer - when she was asked if “she’d consider botox” (she’s mid 40’s like me) she said you can see the “unnatural look” that it leaves.  She like me prefers to go natural (I haven’t released the hair yet, but i’m getting there) because life’s too short to just live in “pretend” mode. 

I was reading that and thought - “so what about spiritual Botox?” - looks good at first, but once you get up close, there’s that “pretending” thing again.

When I have the privilege of being on the radio, there is always the tempation to not site whom I quote - to pretend I’m that wise, insightful, whatever….”it’s takes too much time”, “people don’t really care where it comes from as long as it’s good”, “hey, the resource folks say pretend it’s yours - we don’t want the credit” (on the last point, I think that’s very humble and generous - but I think it can sometimes be an unintentional tool of enablement and can perpetuate an environment that lacks accountability - just my opinion, of course - no offense to lifechurch.tv - they have excellent stuff) - let’s review the definition of pretend……..to give a false appearance - LET’S NOT PRETEND.  How do we expect people to trust pretenders? 

It feels so good when folks are touched by what the LORD chooses to say through me, but if I know that it isn’t something that the Holy Spirit just “dropped” into my head, and I know from where it came, I believe I have the responsibility to inform them of the source so they can do further study on their own.  I think those of us who teach and/or lead will be held to a higher level of accountability because the Bible says we will.  (Remember, I’ve said before that I’m a “zebra thinker” and some things are black and white to me).

I would feel absolutely terrible if on the day of judgment I discovered I cheated someone from growing more because I intentionally withheld information while I was ministering - pretending that it was just a random thought of my own - even if I was given permission to do so.   What’s so hard about sharing resource information?  It’s not. Really!

I know that this is a subject of contention in the church today.  I read an article several months ago on Sermon Search where Steve Sjogren (sp?) and Rick Warren talk about this issue.  There was a great story about a pastor in Africa with no resources and he was always so blessed that he could go to the local post office and download info from Warren’s pastors.com - all of RW’s sermons are available.  I agree with Steve and Rick on this point, I think there is an arrogance in thinking that everything we say has to originate with us.  I don’t think that’s practical or realistic, because we ALL use other people’s materials. We’re all “mentored” by someone (whether we realize it or not)  Those very learned gentlemen have made resources available to assist teachers in their studies through recorded messages, transcripts, etc in the hope that it will help others in their learning process.  (Bill Hybels is another leader who does the same - Andy Stanley too)  However, as I reread that article I did not get the impression that they were encouraging a word for word rendering of their messages, nor encouraging others to use their material in lieu of their own time alone with God is study and prayer. 

I, as a business person, find myself “marketing” things in my mind.  I grew up in a family business where “R&D” in the early days was Mom and Dad discussing what the label would look like during suppertime! It’s in my DNA, I guess. -  Is that wrong? I don’t think so - but lack of moderation in anything is unhealthy - even when it’s a “good” thing.  In the spiritual context, sometimes you gotta let “the wind blow” - John 3:8.  I think that we can “overmarket” things sometimes. I see it happening in the church.  I think that we need to be appropriately prepared but we can’t orchestrate a “God moment” - that’s why it’s a God Moment - only He can do that.  We have such a hard time remembering “His ways are not our ways, His thoughts are not our thoughts”.  Sometimes I find myself, ridiculous as it seems, asking God, “why don’t you think about it like I do?” -DUH!!

In what areas of life do I pretend? I was asking myself this question this morning.  Sometimes I pretend that I’m not really hurt when people accuse me of not caring just because I see things from another perspective.  That I’m a troublemaker because I ask lots of questions.  That my trust in people is predicated on developing an open dialogue where I can be real and not told “you don’t get it” - “you’re just thinking of yourself”, etc.    I know I’m not correct all the time - and sometimes I “fire” before the “ready” - “aim”, which isn’t very smart.  But in as much as I realize my own ability to be wrong - there are some that think it’s a weakness to admit that they are not always 100% all the time.   It makes me think of The Fonz on Happy Days in the episode where he couldn’t get himself to utter the words, “I was wrong” - any of you Boomers out there remember that one?  My sister LeeAnne use that as a measuring stick for pride……are they doing a “Fonz”?  We chuckle - often times it’s because if we didn’t laugh, we’d cry.  -  Sometimes I do a “Fonz” - unsplendid!!

You might have noticed, I’m not at a very good “place” at the moment.  That’s good. That means I’m not pretending.  I’m looking for balance and wisdom.  What’s worth the hassle and what isn’t?  I kind of feel like the kid on the playground who was invited to play because they said “you’re good, we want you on our team” - but when I asked the captain “why do we play the game this way?” the answer I receive is “well, if you don’t like it, too bad - that’s just the way it is”. 

I don’t like pretending (unless I’m singing karaoke - then I pretend I’m Cher - but I don’t where her clothes - Whew! not cool)……….pretending can be fun for a moment, but then it’s back to reality.  I think where we miss the point is, reality isn’t bad - it’s not always fun - but it’s the truth.  Jesus said He’s the truth - and truth sets us free.  I don’t want to pretend that there’s a way to heaven other than Jesus.  I’ll be disappointed if I do.  Eternally.

Tired of pretending? Me too. - I’m 42 years old; I love Jesus Christ because He invited me into His reality, bled, suffered and died so that I don’t have to go to Hell because my sin seperated me from God the Father; I love my husband, kids, family and friends; I don’t love perfectly, because I’m not perfect.  I cry when I feel rejected; I ache when I think of people being used and abused. (especially if I’ve hurt someone)  I believe the Bible has all the answers I need - and the rest is up to God;  I wonder why I’m at the places I’m at sometimes - but I remember Beth Ann reminds me of the words from the Book of Esther - “for such a time as this”; - I’m on vacation right now - I love seafood (seven days of lobster!!) - The clouds are passing, the rain is ceasing, the sun is shining here in Boston.  It’s time to swim.

Peace. -  Please pray for the family of Eva Yoder.  She went home to be with Jesus last night after a 13 year battle with CF.  Her parents Randy and Susan, brothers Zach and Christian have journeyed by her side throught this battle.  I bet they’re tired. Let’s remember them as they grieve.

My feet are tired…..Jillian and I have walked all around Midtown here in Manhattan.  We’re doing our “girly-girl” time for the summer.  Afternoon Tea at American Girl Place (when in doubt, pinky out!)  Saw Lady Liberty - she’s pretty splendid.  Did dinner in Times Square at Bubba Gumps’.  It’s a real thrill to spend time with Jillian.  I’ve been to NYC on several business trips but this is Jillian’s first time.  Everything is new when viewed through the eyes of an eleven year old. We saw the movie “Hairspray” last night. Makes ya wanna dance. And to think I used to have a crush on John Travolta in Jr. High School.  Move over John. We’re old…now it’s Zach Efron. (yes, Jillian has his poster in her room)  Turn, turn, turn. 

A thought kept coming to mind over and over as we strolled 5th Avenue and observed all the “beautiful people”. They are all people of value for whom Christ died.  I find that quite exciting.  Not one, from the wealthiest person entering Trump Tower to the homeless man begging for spare change, is overlooked by Abba Father. 

There were some street evangelists. They were doing a good job of sharing the truth.  They weren’t screaming or carrying on - just calmly sharing that God so loved the world that He gave us His only Son, Jesus.  Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God.  I’m praying that some hearts did some “hearing” and it made them think.  I pray it made them “hungry” for more than a hot dog from a street vendor or, for the upscale folk, beluga caviar and champaigne (or a dry martini - I guess that’s the big deal these days)

It’s been a good day.  I love my daughter. She’s a great friend - she’s a great person. It was a thrill spending the day with her.  Signing off from the Big Apple. 

Peace.  Jesus loves you……and me too. Even when we’re jerks. Whew! Can’t beat that any day of the week.

As we near the end of July, I realize it’s been almost 60 days since I blogged on Jillian’s birthday. I’ve had a very full summer. The launch of Friends Radio Morning Show (Lee Ann, Katie and Suzie - what wonderful sisters you are!), Christian turned 7 on July 16th, two weeks of swimming lessons, developing a new business venture with my husband and sister, producing and training ladies to step out and try “radio” (way to go Jocelyn and Beth!), taking the Harley Davidson Riders Edge course and getting my motorcycle endorsement - my sister LeeAnne Martin (photographybyleeanne.com) scored 100% on her test - way to go Leon!! : ) Watching loved ones transition through life adjustment, mainly grief and moving forward. Life is an adventure. The good, the bad, the ugly.

I guess perhaps I’m a tad more pensive - and I don’t like to live life in a frenzy. So often I read other’s blogs and think, “I guess I’m pretty boring”. Sometimes reading blogs is like watching an episode of ER where the paddles are being used in every scene. I mean, there are days when I am sad, I am frustrated, and I am asking God to speak and He’s not very chatty. I didn’t say He’s not near, but there’s nothing wrong with holy silence if we’re always running down the “hallway of life”. Perhaps the echo of our own footsteps will become so loud that we’ll finally realize that long empty echo is really the emptiness in our souls that we’re trying to escape. I’m all about looking at the glass as half full rather than half empty - we have a hope, an eternal hope, if we know Jesus Christ as Savior. Even in death there’s an upside for the Christ-follower.

But the reality is we do live in a fallen world and this planet is not my home. Sometimes I’d like to say to those in the Body of Christ who seem like they are trying to display some sort of 21st Century “Ozzie and Harriet” lifestyle, to take off the mask. I wish the folks that email my radio show could “live in this bloggers world”. Sad thing is, some of the bloggers share the same hurts, habits and hang-ups that the show callers do - but don’t seem too eager to show that side of things. Guess it’s easier to write about “fun” stuff.

I was recently reminded of John 11. The powerful miracle that Jesus performed when He, the Son of God, raised Lazarus from the dead. Pastor Craig from LIFECHURCH.TV gave some powerful messages in a series called MIRACLES. You can watch the sermons at their website. There was a familar line that my friend Beth says to me about “seeing dead people”. It actually comes from the film “The Sixth Sense” starring Bruce Willis. Jesus sees us dead in our sins. That’s why He came to live, die and be raised from the dead. By His Spirit, He does “show us dead people”. Those whose hearts are broken. Dead in fear, delay, doubt. We all need a miracle.

I guess I say all of that to say this…….life is short, so don’t fake it. We need to admit that we’re all “dead” sometimes. Let’s not be so intent on “looking good on the blog” that we try to fool the folks Jesus has called to help us “take off the grave clothes”. When we let other’s see the mess, they get to be part of God’s “Miracle Cleaning Crew”.

Sometimes Jesus waits, and let’s something die before He brings it back to life. Death is unknown and scary - but in the life and the death of hopes, dreams and relationships God never leaves us and He never foresakes us. If we deny something’s dead, then Jesus will just have to wait longer to bring it back to life. Remember, resurrection is for God’s glory…and He will share His glory with no one.

(Your name here), come forth!!! - Love, Jesus

It’s time to really live. I love you. Your are important to God. Never forget that.

Thanks to my dear, dear friends who unwrapped my grave clothes after Jesus gave me life. Peace.

Today is our daughter Jillian’s 11th birthday!  WOW!  I can’t believe how quickly the time has passed.  She’s starting to become a young lady and I pray that she will be inclined to the LORD and His heart for her.  She is His masterpiece! Eph. 2:10.  Happy Birthday, Splendid Lady.

As I pray this morning, the Proverb Du Jour from the One Year Bible is Proverbs 16:18.  The message therein convicts and encourages my heart.   “Pride goes before destruction, and haughiness before a fall.”  

I’m encouraged to know that God loves us so much that He ”lights up the dashboard with warning lights”.  It’s our choice whether or not we will heed the warning.  It seems the more we know, the more daring we become in pushing the limit.  I guess that can be good or bad depending on ones perspective.  I know that I get “prideful” when I’m looking at the digital readout on my car.  Use to be that I’d see the fuel needle approaching empty and think, ”well, time to fill up”.  Now I can see, “5 miles, 4 miles, 3 miles…….”.  I guess I “get prideful” when I assume that I am going to be able to get fuel when I hit empty.  So, what happens when I get ”stuck” in traffic and it burns up more fuel than I had anticipated?  Hmmmmmm…….I could well be positioning myself to be sitting “high and dry”.

Pride does that to our spirits.  I cannot indefinately run on the “fumes” in my tank.  Fumes are not pure fuel.  Sometimes we “smell” like devoted followers of Jesus, but our ”tanks” are dangerously low.  The dashboard panel light is flashing, but we choose to “take our chances”.  It’s prideful and extremely unwise. 

What’s your “fuel gauge” reading today?  Remember, those who travel with you will also be “blessed or harmed” by your choices.  Don’t be prideful.  If you are, destruction is guaranteed. 

Pray with me…….Heavenly Father, in the name of Jesus, please help me, my friend and Jillian to always be mindful of You and Your desire for us.  Help us to be humble in heart, just like Jesus (Phil. 2).  May we keep our eyes focused on You and the “dashboard” of Your Word.  Keep us in Your perfect peace as we keep our focus on You. (Isaiah 26:3-4)….and all God’s children said, “amen”. 

Hey Folks……..hope you enjoyed the Memorial Day weekend. It’s a time for family, friends and remembering.

This weekend also happened to be grad weekend in our community. Lots of parties, chatting, and chocolate!

I was helping a friend with her son’s graduation party and my assignment was the chocolate fountain. An interesting job to say the least. It was fun….and I had only one spot on my white shirt at the end of the day. What was I thinking? Chocolate and a white shirt. Oh well, Spray & Wash to the rescue!!

Back to the chocolate fountain….it flowed with luscious, rich, smooth chocolate. It effortlessly rippled down the sides of the statue of stainless steel. Quite the neat invention, if you ask me.

I guess as I was melting the 28 lbs of chocolate to pour into the fountain, it gave me ample time to think, pray, stir, think some more….well, you get the picture. I was reminded that moderation isn’t a bad thing. As I looked at what seemed to be a river of the “fruit” of our friend the cocoa bean, I thought “no more for today, thank you”. A good thing at the wrong time can make you feel pretty lousy.

Speaking of feeling lousy, perhaps you’re reading along with the Circle of Friends One Year Bible Group. If you are you’ll remember we read about King David’s unwise choice of having an affair with Bethsheba. After his hormornally motivated lack of judgment, he had created a multifacted disaster. Bethsheba was pregnant and David tried to cover his tracks by having her husband come back from the battlefield. When Uriah, Bethsheba’s dude, wouldn’t “indulge” in marital activities because he didn’t feel right about enjoying himself when his troups were still out there fighting - David made yet another rash choice that impacted several lives. He ordered that Uriah be set on the front lines of the battle field knowing that he would be killed. (Yep folks, who needs The Young and the Restless when you can read the Bible??!!)

There’s more to the story, but suffice to say, King David had access to everything a man could want. Power, good looks (the Bible says he was a “easy on the eyes”), influence - you know, whatever he wanted. So, with all of that why did he have to steal another man’s wife, murder the man - a trusted soldier in David’s army, and royally (no pun intended) make a mess of things?

Because we humans seek after things that God intended for a specific time, place and/or relationship and think there will be no consequences for doing it “my way” - (go to iTunes and start playing Frank Sinatra). David lusting after Bethsheba was akin to a diabetic staring at the chocolate fountain. Keep on looking and more than likely it’s gonna be a problem.

Whether it’s sex, eating, drinking, shopping, gossiping, whatever - better watch out. What begins as a look, a taste, or a thought can soon turn into far more than we anticipated.

What’s before your eyes? What have you developed a taste for? What do you find yourself thinking about? Take a moment to ask God if it’s pleasing to Him. If you don’t ask Him now, you’ll be explaining it later. Perhaps those confessions will come through tears of regret and remorse. Are you involved in something that God meant for good and you’ve perverted it as you act out in the energy of the flesh?

Just remember, chocolate isn’t bad in and of itself. It’s actually a blessing and a pleasure to be enjoyed - but you can’t live on it and be healthy.

Today began in an unusual way…..sometimes my hubby sleeps with the TV on in our room. I’m pretty much “over and out” once I hit my stride, so the noise doesn’t bother me. Whew!! You can tell my babies aren’t babies any more! (I mean I sleep at night) Sorry, rabbit trail - as I was about to say, I awoke this morning to a pastor quoting the Prayer of Jabez. (“Jabez called on the God of Israel, saying, ‘Oh that Thou would bless me indeed, and enlarge my coast [territory], and that Thine hand might be with me, and that Thou would keep me from evil, that it may not grieve me!’ And God granted him that which he requested.” 1 Chron 4:10)

It’s wild because I have had so many folks speaking into my life about God expanding my borders, as it were. (Even though circumstances would sometimes speak otherwise) I have incredible people that love me well and encouage me like crazy. I’m even hearing affirmation from some very unexpected places. It blew me away….today someone was speaking so passionately regarding my ministry heartbeat - and a decade ago it would have been the complete opposite. God is truly incredible.

Tonight I was at a school function. (Jillian and Christian’s Right To Read Week Bookfair) This precious lady, a long time treasured friend named is Wilma, and I enjoyed some sweet fellowship in the hallways of Berlin Elementary. Earlier today, I had an incredible meeting with some really splendid ladies whom God has brought together to partner with united hearts to bless and encourage a community via radio. How broad that community becomes will be at the LORD’s discretion. (Suzie, Lee Ann, Katie - praying for you)

Last night I heard my husband and dear, dear friends from my small group lift me up to God as I was feeling pretty weary. God bless them, one and all. Bless them indeed and increase their territory. Give them wisdom too, so that they would not bring pain to themselves or others.

I’ve been reminded so many times in the last several days how the decisions we make impact those around us. How when we run ahead of God and His timetable we’re setting ourselves up for trouble. It may not be a total disaster, but only by the grace of God. But, “O the grace we forfeit when we choose to worship worthless idols.” You’re probably saying, “she sure does quote that verse often.” Good, glad you noticed. If you did perhaps you’re like me and have to be reminded of that truth and the consequences should we choose to ignore it.

Well, it’s been a long, eventful day. Sounds like the last load of laundry is nearing its conclusion.

May God bless all my pals, God bless you too. In Jesus’ name. Amen

Hey Folks…..I know it’s been a while since my last post. My friend Suzie Thomas (PR Director @Malone College) and I had a blast on That’s Life on Fox. Robin Swoboda is a great hostess and although I prefer doing radio (you know, the hair thing) doing TV isn’t too bad. Especially when you can be real and have fun doing it. Thanks, Robin. You’re a hoot!

Friday my friend Lee Ann Miller and I are taking a step of faith and doing some meetings to see what God has next. There’s been something stirring in our hearts and as Lee Ann says, we’ll “stik a fork in it” (you can read her blog at leeannmiller.net)- will it need to “cook” a bit longer? Perhaps….but after all these years, I know that God’s timing is best.

This week I’ve been reminded (by reading 1 Samuel in the One Year Bible - btw, if you’d like to join the Circle of Friends Bible Reading Group just send me a message) that God moves at His own pace and if we want to really screw things up, just run ahead of Him. Sure, He’ll pick us up when we stumble due to our ignorant impatience - but how many times do we have to our scrape knees before we get the hint? I admire Samuel’s mom Hannah. She promised God to give her son to His service if she would be able to become a mother. (Oh, Happy Mother’s Day to all you moms out there!) - Now think of it. I have a hard enough time releasing a piece of chocolate or a bad attitude, not to mention handing over my little boy, the life so deeply longed for. Hannah, that wise woman, knew that apart from God she could do nothing. (Jesus would remind us of this truth in John 15)

So like Hannah, and my other Christ-following sisters, cry out to God and tell Him what’s up. He loves to hear your precious voice. Then position your heart to wait on Him to give, take away, narrow, broaden and reveal the promise that He speaks in Ephsians 2:10…….”We are God’s (The Perfect Father) masterpiece/workmanship. Created anew in Christ Jesus the Son so as to have the opportunity to walk and live out all of the many incredible purposes of God - the ones that He created for us before the beginning of time.” (my “translation”)

Hope your “recipes” are “fully cooked” and you’ve given “the dish” the adequate time to rest - then, by faith, serve it to the Master. Prepared well, serving well.

When God’s given you something to cook - make sure you watch the stove,  follow the directions and serve as recommended.

Why shoes?

Is that really a true statement? If I really want to do something, guess what? I “make” time for it. Isn’t that the silliest phrase? How self-deceptive… - “i make time”; - time to blog - time to shower - time to eat - time for family - time for sex (hope that doesn’t offend - just being real) - I make time to do whatever. Why don’t we just admit it? We don’t really make time - we spend time. We spend time on what we worship. So think about the last 24 hours. How did you SPEND your time? Who or what did you worship? How will you spend the next 24 hours, assumingly (is that the proper word?), afforded to you?

I thought about this today as I remembered my Aunt Alice on what would have been her 67th birthday. My sister LeeAnne and I chatted about Aunt Alice for quite a while and were reminded how thankful we are for the time we “spent” with her. We both wish we would have spent more. (we would have laughed more - cried more too - laughed more……Oh, I already mentioned that didn’t I? - If you knew Aunt Alice, you’d understand!! - Tra la la)

Choices, choices. Time is a gift of great value. Spend it wisely. God will reward your stewardship.